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If I start out with my core of 5 players, it would take me 4 ages to fill this kingdom if I get three moves, I get one decent defecting player that wants to stay and one guy that magically wants to trade his province. Assuming each round is 12 weeks, that'd be 48 weeks. Almost a year to build a kingdom.
I started out mid-round with a core of 5 players, including myself. All others were killed off due to excessive inactivity or AA provinces. The round after we had 20 active players and were somewhere in the top 100-200. That was without trading, just randoms. When players quit, the province died. You get to move in 3 friends per round AND you get to replace quitting players. You're far better off with the new system. It's a net benefit for your kingdom while hardly affecting the top. In fact, to the extent that top kingdoms do abide by the new rules (my own kingdom does), they're worse off than before. What is your problem?