Realest will help you find a kingdom

[Realest]

That's right, as the title says, I can help you find a kingdom.

For the record this isn't a trolling attempt. Someone suggested to me that maybe by putting more players in kingdoms that have the personnel to teach them game mechanics, we can improve the quality of competition between kingdoms, and I figured it sounded fun, and I put up this post.

I was just browsing these boards, and I noticed people tend to pimp up their kingdom and its hard to verify whether it is true or not. I'm not accusing anyone of being a liar, but some of the stuff here is objective. For example, a kingdom may be 4-4 in war wins, but what are the quality of the wins? Conversely, you have a kingdom standing at 5-1, but they might just be in a slump in this small sample size. Are the kingdom mates fun to chill with or are they strictly mean asses who just treat you as another robot in an account?

Well, here is where I come in. I've played utopia on all levels, and as a result, have developed some contacts with every level or know someone who can hook me up. So if you want to contact me and tell me what type of kd you're looking for, with a description of your skills, I can most certainly refer you somewhere. Alas, I don't have my own kingdom for you to play in being retired, but you can be comforted knowing that the kingdom I send you to would be Realest approved. My game knowledge speaks for itself if you took up my post and playing history, so you can be assured that I know what to look for in kingdoms worth joining.

No one wants to waste their time test driving different kds, so why not take advantage of the 1 month age coming up to see if my recommendation will help you find a fun group of guys who fit your ideals.


Here is a testimonial of a player I have helped:

<Shockwave> I've been playing utopia for 8.5 years but I've always had bad luck and always playing in a ghetto until recently when discovered "Realest i'll find you a home foundation"

Note that even Shockwave, a very prominent figure in the community, was helped by me, and now he plays in Playboys. <33 shockie.







PS: some (if not all) quotes found in this post were fabricated, but the intentions are sincere.



edit: forgot to leave contact info. My irc nick is obviously Realest, and i can usually be found in #heretics. You can also pm me here on these forums.

[Fate1316]

Realest ftw <3

Find me a KD plz?

[Dazzanub]

I tried the "Realest find u home" program. And it works! I was lost wandering around utopia looking for a good home. I had started playing in probably age 4 and hopped kingdoms aimlessly..until salvation came. I was spamming a random channel with all my usual bs, when Realest came through the clouds like my long lost savior. He pointed me in the right direction. He obviously pointed me right to his own kingdom, but that's besides the point. In this kingdom, i found friendship and leadership. I was tought so many things about this game through Realest's guidance. I finally was playing an awesome kingdom! Realest, honestly set me free. I recommend this program/foundation to every player playing utopia. Whether you're a dumb nub just beginning, or even the most experienced player, Realest can help! I could probably write a 5 page paper about Realest's wisdom, but I'm just too lazy...

[Lordwarallied]

thats actually funny. i might just actually try it out.

[Realest]

you might actually think its funny but I've seriously helped 3 people already, no joke.

[Crimson]

Realest is a pimp . keep it real negro

[Dazzanub]

I think he's Asian descent crimson

but his basketball skills might be negro

[clarey]

Realest is ftw

[Luc]

People might think this is a joke. But seriously, if you need a kd, let him help you. He's very connected and knows a lot of people to set you up with

[Macon]

"I was tought so many things about this game through Realest's guidance."

You play from age 4 and you was still tougt so many things. You must be retarded.

[Realest]

i bet i could teach you a ton of things also. The issue is that, depending on what level of play you play at, there is always stuff to learn when you advance your gameplay. Even myself personally have learned a lot as I played with other players.

Pretending you know it all is silly because I highly doubt you do. Retarded is the one who thinks there is nothing to learn. Intelligence is the one who shows a willingness and ability to learn. Kindly refrain from insulting people and if this thread has no value to you, you can simply ignore.

[Macon]

I highly doubt you are the one who could teach me anything else than a minor tweak or two.

[Catwalk]

Kindly refrain from insulting people and if this thread has no value to you, you can simply ignore.

Your sense of irony is heaps better than assumed.

[Realest]

I highly doubt you are the one who could teach me anything else than a minor tweak or two.

I bet you I could make you a player you can only dream to be. I've taught enough noobs, and can easily identify and classify you as the know it all type who really sucks

Your sense of irony is heaps better than assumed.

Thanks. After all I am human, and not immune to these mortal emotions and characteristics. I've also been told I wield sarcasm quite effectively.

[Alosan]

I need a kingdom with 24 players who will obey my command and worship me on a daily basis. Help me :$