Krozair's Krackup's

[Krozair]

My wife and I went to the Lincolnshire county farm show and one of the first exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls. We went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said 'THIS BULL MATED 50 TIMES LAST YEAR'. My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs, smiled and said "He mated 50 times last year, that's almost once a week!".
We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said 'THIS BULL MATED 150 TIMES LAST YEAR'. My wife gave me a healthy jab and said "WOW! That's more than twice a week!! You could learn a lot from him".
We walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said in capital letters 'THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR'.
My wife was so excited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs and said "That's once a day. You could REALLY learn something from this one". I looked at her and said "Go over and ask him if it was with the same old cow".
I don't remember much about what happened next. My condition has been upgraded from critical to stable, I should eventually make a full recovery.

[Krozair]

I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I'll let you know.

[Krozair]

In the morning Tom calls to his boss:

– Good morning, boss, unfortunately, I’m not coming to work today. I’m really sick. I got a headache, stomach ache, and my both hands and legs hurt, so I’m not coming into work.”

The boss replies:

– You know Tom; I really need you today. When I feel like this I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That makes me feel better, and I can go to work. You should try that.

2 hours later Bob calls:

– Boss, I followed your advice, and I feel great! I’ll be at work soon. By the way, you got a nice house.