There's a lot of kds trying to build up their kd and become successful but they just can't get their feet off the ground. So I figured I would start this to try and help. This is mostly for monarchs but if you're in a smaller kd and actively try and help I guess it can be for you as well lol
-Monarchy-
The monarch should be the monarch. You should be an example for your kd as far as prov management and activity. If there's no reason for a random person to follow your orders, they won't. There shouldn't be any doubt about following you and your decisions. If you can't fit into the monarchy shoes, don't put them on. You can still play a role in kd-leadership without wearing the crown.
-Diplomacy-
The best way of dealing with problems is not letting them spiral out of control. So often you hear the horror stories from ghetto monarchs about how they're getting bottomfed from 4 different kds and it's because the monarch didn't handle the situation before it got out of hand. Everyone who loves this game will tell you it's because of the community so get proactive and talk to the other monarchs who are showing an interest in your kd for whatever reason. Yea, you'll get your fair share of idiot monarchs who shouldn't be there in the first place, but you'll also run into some awesome people, maybe even get an ally/friend out of it.
-Inactives-
For the love of all that is good, stop trying to clear out your inactives. It's a waste of time, effort and resources. Odds are they're just going to be replaced by another inactive prov who you'll have to waste even more time and effort removing. If they're inactive long enough the monarch can just remove them with one click of a button and if they show up again, give them another shot. If they cause enough problems, say they'll shape up and they don't, then you can consider getting rid of them because they're actively hurting the kd.
-Explorers-
This one goes along with the inactives part. It's almost instinct for ghettos to see someone exploring and go into panic mode as far as trying to get rid of them. There's really no reason to do this. They're active. They aren't hurting the kd. They can help the kd if you just work with them. And again, by getting rid of them odds are you're just going to replace them with an inactive. Use the resources that you have, don't throw them to the curb because they don't quite fit with what you're trying to do. A good leader adapts to the situation, they don't try and change the situation to fit their plans.
-Moves/Invites-
I can understand that smaller kds don't exactly have the some connections as the bigger ones, but that's no excuse to waste your invites. These are the key to building yourself a respectable kd. If you waste your invites on a crappy player that's just going to ditch you, then you either get to wait 3 weeks or blow $10 to try and replace him. Get an idea who this guy/girl is before you use your invite on them. I'm not saying you need like a full interview process or something, just a few questions. If they aren't willing to talk a bit with you about the kd and such, do you really think they're going to stick it out with you while you're building the kd up?
-Leadership Style-
This is a bit tricky since it can be different from person to person, but however you choose to lead your kd, you need to stick by it and you can't be a doormat. Stick with your requirements. If you ask people for 2 hits a day in war and they aren't delivering then something needs to be done, whether you're a monarch that isn't interested in excuses, or if you want to work with them and try to get them to do better, you need to make it clear that it's not acceptable and obviously that goes with whatever rules there are for the kd. That leads to the last thing...
-The Monarch isn't always right-
Every now and then, the monarch will make the wrong call. The appropriate way to handle it: "Hey, I think you're absolutely wrong about this. Here's why: ...". The wrong way to handle it: *notices problem, ignores it, let's kd fail*, "OMFG, noob monarch! GTFO!" Leadership issues are unavoidable and it's up the kdmates that know better to help the leaders out. Monarchs need a good backbone in the kd. Not necessarily a "council" setup, but a trusted group of opinions.
Meh, hope some of this was helpful...