Warcry of the Jerks

[BlackIce]

Author's Note: I would like to extend my apologies for the EXTREME delay on this article. Initially I was awaiting for Elitist Jerks to respond with their side, and in the process left on vacation. I returned about a week ago and am only now getting caught up. I do not like to pass up opportunities on articles, and I apologize again for the excessive delay!

About a week and a half into the age, the kingdom of Warcry had already obtained their first win with a gain of about 5,000 acres. Roughly 40 hours after the end of the war, Warcry noticed they were starting to stock gc and were already retrained, so they decided to exit their war ending ceasefire early to begin pumping science at a faster pace.

To their dismay, about an hour after they exited ceasefire the then untagged kingdom of Elitist Jerks began to plunder Warcry's new stash of gold. In response, Warcry started a dragon, began blanket Meteor Showers and started retalling.

Approximately 24 hours into the hostile, Elitist Jerks decided to enter Fortified stance, so Warcry assumed the hostile would be at it's end. They sent their dragon and went back into pumping sciences.

Wrong in their assumption, Warcry came back the next day to see Elitist Jerks were no longer in fortified, and waved again for approximately 2k acres. Frustrated, Warcry declared war.

April 3 of YR1 We have declared WAR on DOTA 2 Hostile!

Under the presumption the still untagged kingdom they were facing was a semi-ghetto, Warcry chose to basically max gain, and used their economy to out-train Jerks. For an early age top-feeding war, this strategy appeared fairly effective. Although the war lasted for eleven utopia months, the final reward for Warcry's decision was pleasing and worthwhile.



Comments:

Elitist Jerks was unavailable for comments.

vdshark, monarch of Warcry, commented:
"Was a fun war, expected a bit more from EJ"

** Hostile summary from Warcry **

Total Attacks Made: 12 (1034 acres)
-- Traditional March: 11 (1034 acres)
-- Learns: 1
Total Attacks Suffered: 36 (2311 acres)
-- Traditional March: 29 (2311 acres)
-- Plunders: 5
-- Failed Attacks: 2 (5.6% failure)


The Kingdom of Warcry

Total acres exchanged: -1277 acres (12/36)
+101 acres: Blumpie Town (2/2)
+88 acres: Justins Timber (3/0)
+23 acres: OhMiBod (3/4)
+16 acres: Kokeshi Boy Doll (1/1)
-25 acres: Silver Bullet (1/2)
-68 acres: Snugglepuss (1/2)
-87 acres: i10 dancer Tango (0/2)
-112 acres: Wand - James Wand (1/3)
-114 acres: Johnny Deep (0/3)
-115 acres: Sweet Obsession DivineMassager (0/1)
-123 acres: Strap-on Batman (0/2)
-124 acres: Doc Johnson Lucid Dreams (0/2)
-159 acres: Power Bunny (0/2)
-170 acres: Waterproof Wabbit Vibe (0/2)
-172 acres: Mr Markus 9 (0/5)
-236 acres: Corn On The Cob (0/3)


The Kingdom of Elitist Jerks

Total acres exchanged: +1174 acres (30/8)
+190 acres: Dragon Knight (3/1)
+164 acres: Ursa (2/0)
+121 acres: Doom Bringer (1/0)
+115 acres: Axe (1/0)
+109 acres: Warlock (1/0)
+100 acres: Crystal Maiden (1/0)
+90 acres: Lycanthrope (1/0)
+87 acres: Outworld Destroyer (1/0)
+80 acres: Ancient Apparition (1/0)
+79 acres: Faceless Void (2/0)
+77 acres: Brewmaster (1/0)
+70 acres: Enigma (1/0)
+68 acres: Beastmaster (2/0)
+66 acres: Shadow Fiend (1/0)
+65 acres: Life Stealer (1/0)
+57 acres: Lina (1/0)
+55 acres: Spirit Breaker (1/0)
+44 acres: Shadow Demon (1/0)
+44 acres: Vengeful Spirit (1/0)
-58 acres: Viper (2/1)
-223 acres: Queen of Pain (0/2)
-226 acres: Skeleton King (4/4)




===========================




** WAR summary from Warcry **

Total Attacks Made: 951 (64617 acres)
-- Traditional March: 915 (63686 acres)
-- Ambush: 16 (931 acres)
-- Massacres: 6 (6298 people)
-- Failed Attacks: 14 (1.5% failure)
Total Attacks Suffered: 926 (55103 acres)
-- Traditional March: 893 (54871 acres)
-- Ambush: 3 (172 acres)
-- Raze: 4 (60 acres)
-- Massacres: 1 (320 people)
-- Failed Attacks: 25 (2.7% failure)


The Kingdom of Warcry

Total acres exchanged: +9514 acres (951/926)
+1213 acres: Kokeshi Boy Doll (43/30)
+909 acres: Strap-on Batman (50/30)
+854 acres: Wand - James Wand (43/41)
+819 acres: Pleasure Periscope (14/5)
+761 acres: Bullet Bunny (28/27)
+621 acres: Power Bunny (44/32)
+595 acres: Allota Fagina (15/6)
+528 acres: Dildo Baggins (7/0)
+516 acres: i10 dancer Tango (58/68)
+506 acres: Johnny Deep (45/32)
+469 acres: The Shake Spear (9/0)
+456 acres: Shaftalicious (47/51)
+442 acres: Waterproof Wabbit Vibe (57/38)
+427 acres: Morning Glory (7/4)
+376 acres: Snugglepuss (41/38)
+354 acres: OhMiBod (38/35)
+207 acres: Doc Johnson Lucid Dreams (54/49)
+165 acres: Blumpie Town (41/37)
+79 acres: Sweet Obsession DivineMassager (59/59)
+9 acres: Justins Timber (66/98)
-81 acres: Corn On The Cob (61/97)
-119 acres: Silver Bullet (53/58)
-252 acres: Brad Pitts Arm (8/14)
-340 acres: Mr Markus 9 (63/77)


The Kingdom of Elitist Jerks

Total acres exchanged: -9594 acres (919/951)
+270 acres: Vengeful Spirit (25/10)
+113 acres: Shadow Demon (30/14)
+65 acres: Dark Seer (23/22)
-85 acres: Brewmaster (26/23)
-128 acres: Death Prophet (0/1)
-137 acres: Ancient Apparition (46/39)
-157 acres: Spirit Breaker (55/38)
-207 acres: Dragon Knight (42/39)
-257 acres: Zeus (0/2)
-272 acres: Life Stealer (39/29)
-363 acres: Shadow Fiend (50/53)
-405 acres: Outworld Destroyer (37/28)
-514 acres: Ursa (58/69)
-554 acres: Axe (23/25)
-571 acres: Crystal Maiden (35/33)
-620 acres: Faceless Void (48/44)
-626 acres: Warlock (54/67)
-629 acres: Enigma (35/38)
-643 acres: Lycanthrope (42/36)
-652 acres: Doom Bringer (46/57)
-702 acres: Beastmaster (52/73)
-740 acres: Skeleton King (61/97)
-793 acres: Viper (43/44)
-987 acres: Lina (49/70)

[Scavenger]

looong (war)

[Elit]

This kind of wars are so stressful! GJ from both kds.

[WickedL]

vdshark is such a class act. If you needed 11 days to beat another kd you could've atleast come up with a more respectful comment? ;;

[Chuck]

vdshark is such a class act. If you needed 11 days to beat another kd you could've atleast come up with a more respectful comment? ;;

vdshark simply isn't a classy gentleman. He isn't very intelligent either - otherwise he wouldn't come talking trash in my public channel every time he gets a random hit from one of my guys. LOL

[flutterby]

Why was it a bad quote? So he thought EJ would have fought harder. Given the fact I've seen him say much
worse...... :P

[fuzzy|]

It was a good war and unfortunately we staying in it for 24hrs to long and thus the big acre loses. We underestimated their elves and thus lost the war.

It was a challenging war and we also expected more from ourselves but hey theres always round 2

On a happier note though - EJ finally think Pendel and VDShark now have 1 friend (each other!)

[Sephi]

Was good fun I think, long, and not healthy for shark.

Tho I seem to recall that the war forums got boring/annoying... but that might be my memory serving me wrong...

and yay finally the article is up :P thought it was forgotten/lost somewhere by now.

oh and for the comment of vdshark: its pretty nice for him :P and don't expect us to come up with a bigger comment after such a long delay ;-)

[johnnyk]

If it weren't for vdshark's quotes this game would be plain and boring as ****.

Chuck, people don't play this game to get bored to death white being mannered to each other. Granted, i'm not saying that vdshark is mannered the rest of the time, but, I for one would rather people stir up drama than continue being anemic mannered farms. vdshark is just bull****ting around in order to get some rivalries - keep people entertained (I remember myself doing the same thing when i was in charge of the kd).

Also, gz and have a good age.

[Pendel1]

Comments:
Elitist Jerks was unavailable for comments.

1.Noone even asked us for comment!
2. I will never again enter war on 50% draft desperate to give fun to my team!

[coboss]

Waited this long for this underwhelming article? Wow. It doesn't even say who won!!!!! Nor anything about why it took 11 days to sort it out and why EJ was forced to WD. Wow.

Anyways, grats on the win WarCry and props on the long war, those are always so fun lol. Gonna agree with WickedL that how can you expect more from a KD that lost over 11 days? Unless you expected to lose... in which case why not pump your own KD mates tires instead of throwing your opponent under the bus?

[Zendor]

I was kind of hoping they'd say why the war took 11 days.

If I were to guess though, it was probably because EJ has this habit of letting their ego/pride get in the way when they're clearly losing a war and will just let it drag on for several days more than it should go. Why? Maybe they hope to bore or annoy the other KD into inactivity to try and turn things around. Or maybe they hope the other KD will just surrender/MP just so they can pump or war somebody else.

[dahno]

ofcourse there has to be at least one hater in the thread that can make assumptions. well -buddy- let me fill in the blanks:
ej waved daily since oop, all the kds CFed, ended up at 19k acres.
i will not abbreviate warcry cus it's 'wc' and trolls might see an oportunity to... okey... so wc was 16k acres and the same nw size as ej. ej waved. war was declared. ej raped wc for a week, but got so many acres that the other side started to gain massive land even if they were less active, ej had almost all of wc's acres so they decided to share some.
the finish: sci gains from their first ww (it was big compared to ej's 0 sci) + their gold pooping combo + ub elves = ww #2 for wc. the end. i hope you liked it

so just to be clear: ej dominated most of the war, only in the last two days wc started to grow. it's the ridiculous gold making race/pers combo that saved wc in the end, it was not some brilliant strategical move, or some uber hard core activity, it was the simple fact they were gaining nw faster than ej and there was no the time to turn the war around cus of the auto-wd settings. they were being inactive and making a ton of gold, you can't beat that

[dingy2]

they were being inactive and making a ton of gold, you can't beat that

Steal it?

To belittle their nw gain is a bit silly. That's the only thing that matters in war. Acres drives it mostly, but being up on acres early means very little if you can't grow into it in a long war.

[Zendor]

ofcourse there has to be at least one hater in the thread that can make assumptions.

I wouldn't call it "being a hater" so much as "making an educated guess based on previous experiences" :P