In Conclusion:
The dirty truth no one tells a new or even a seasoned player is that your province isn't yours....in their grand design.
I'm here to tell you that your province is yours if you want.
Many probably forgot that when you signed into this game the introduction implies building your province with peasants and wizards, schools, war crafts, banks and homes. It mentions teamwork and all the active participant rhetoric one would expect.
However...
All over this game the meta is: you are a robot or you control robots. Bad kingdoms have bad robots or bad controllers. Good kingdoms the opposite. No one cares about your province.
When was the last time you heard an organized kingdom compliment a core province for exceeding expectations?
You don't.
Do you know why?
Because they aren't permitted to exceed expectation. They can only do as they're told or disappoint.
This to me is the deepest problem in the game. We have powerful leaders dangle success in the face of ambitious players and they give their self determination away. If this meta culture was isolated to the areas of crown competition then it's not a problem. The thing is these meta gamers stick their head in others business based in their efficient mechanics to bully. Those bullies continue the bigger fish trend and the province gamer is faced with a few decisions.
My decision was to challenge the meta and play the game my way. I invite you to play the game your way. The Virtual Kingdom is about getting us together but a confident player doesn't require the template. This template is about fun and I'm sure it would do fine in this meta environment. I'm out here doing it and I'm doing it almost alone. I'm about 3000 acres give or take and have absorbed 112 attacks as of last count.
It's a game, so play it. ;-)