Trumpets were sounded, armies were assembled. The thousands of troops of our kingdom were quivering in delight, anticipating the upcoming war with Famous Last Words (FLW) kingdom. We haven’t had war for a long time that this chronicler could not find the last war history. It may have been well over two years, and our soldiers’ eyes were burning with bloodlust.

Our kingdom, Randomination, was slightly bigger with a networth difference of about 200,000gc. Despite that, FLW showed signs that they wanted to fight us.

Tension started as our kingdom hit in FLW even though they were fortified; our provinces sending out armies starting on the 20th of February, year 7th. Monarchs of both kingdoms met in secret and agreed that it is time for war. Still in fortified stance, FLW started to lure their dragon with gold and as such, we responded two days after.

FLW answered our hits with 11 land grabs, one attack shy of ours. With an attack difference, they lost 129 acres to us. However, they gained the declare war button.

The next month, the button was pressed, war was declared. But not by the kingdom we were expecting.

March 20 of YR7 Old Greg (x:x) has declared WAR with our kingdom!

A bigger army met us in the battlefield bearing flags of Old Greg kingdom, not FLW! We were confused; provincial rulers and generals had an emergency meeting. We can’t simply battle with a kingdom 1 million in networth more than ours! The leaders declared.

Inquests were hastily made to ascertain who led us to this doom; history books and army ledgers were spread about. Finally the culprits were identified and the rascals confessed to their mistakes. The first one attacked two juicy provinces of Old Greg. He plundered and learned from one province. The second culprit wasn’t aware he was hitting into the same province, he too did a learn. Angered that he only gained a few books, he pillaged the same province, razed it, and grabbed land. The first culprit hit again for knowledge in the same kingdom, but with another province.

With only 9 hits – 5 Learns, 2 Plunders, 1 Raze, and 1 Traditional March, these two provinces irked the rulers of this mighty kingdom. We have been marked as hostile!

Right now, provinces have been massacred and reduced to half their sizes. We tried to put up a fight, but Old Greg’s forces were overwhelming. Our biggest provinces were their middle size and they had plenty of unbreakables.

Since one of the offender was Dutch, we all blamed him. (I don't get this joke though).

Currently, our kingdom has lost 1,577 acres, 847 acres were razed, and thousands upon thousands of people massacred.

** Summary **
Total attacks made: 24 (1,226 acres)
-- Traditional march: 23 (1,144 acres)
-- Ambush: 1 (82 acres)
-- Uniques: 9
Total attacks suffered: 62 (2,803 acres)
-- Traditional march: 50 (2,709 acres)
-- Ambush: 2 (94 acres)
-- Raze: 6 (0 acres)
-- Massacre: 1 (5,427 population)
-- Learn: 2
-- Failed: 1 (1.6% failure)
-- Uniques: 39

** The kingdom of Randomination **
Total land exchanged: -1,577 (24/62)
+102 Pie Hard (4/0)
+68 Shahrukh Gan (3/4)
- Anacs Tower (0/1)
-15 xdDEATHDEALERxd (1/4)
-104 Fuego (0/7)
-343 Deja Vu (4/11)
-459 Forces from (8/18)
-826 smear (4/17)


** The kingdom of Old Greg **
Total land exchanged: +1,577 (62/24)
+444 Really EXotic time (10/1)
+341 Exually Active (6/0)
+215 ShmoozbEX (4/2)
+195 the mills millz millers (4/0)
+193 freEXia (5/0)
+173 EXpert timing (5/0)
+152 EXtraordinarilyHandsome (3/0)
+139 Land of G (3/0)
+125 Extremely Ridiculously SExy (1/0)
+61 Devious eX (3/0)
+51 EXidentally Good (2/0)
+41 Maximilian II (7/0)
+13 Skystead (1/0)
-29 eX men (5/4)
-111 ExtraordinaryGentleman (3/2)
-426 EXistential EXistence (0/15)

** Uniques for Randomination **
Forces from - 3
Deja Vu - 2
smear - 1
xdDEATHDEALERxd - 1
Shahrukh Gan - 1
Pie Hard - 1

** Uniques for Old Greg **
Really EXotic time - 4
the mills millz millers - 4
freEXia - 4
ShmoozbEX - 4
eX men - 3
Maximilian II - 3
Exually Active - 3
ExtraordinaryGentleman - 2
EXidentally Good - 2
Land of G - 2
Devious eX - 2
EXpert timing - 2
EXtraordinarilyHandsome - 2
Skystead - 1
Extremely Ridiculously SExy - 1