There's no problem with not wanting to play the game competitively, it can be played sandbox style like Sim City to some extent. And the OP does have a point that in weak kingdoms any active player is generally an asset since there are empty slots and overall little involvement. You risk having very little fun if you insist on staying tiny though, rather than just small. You shouldn't fall too much behind your kingdom or the team aspect of it will lose all meaning. Genesis might be better suited for you.