Elitest Jerks were looking for war so approached the kingdom of Hoff but were turned down. They then asked Dopefiends if they wanted to have a war, which they were happy to provide. With war agreed, Jerks dropped the cf they had in place:
February 12 of YR12 We have cancelled our ceasefire with Dopefiends of Asgard
The hostile period was brief as Jerks were in aggressive and hit 8 times with Dopies retalling so that they could declare war:
February 13 of YR12 Dopefiends of War has declared WAR with our kingdom!
At the start of war Dopies were 92k acres with Jerks sitting on 90.5k acres. Dopefiends were loaded with gold and runes, which Jerks focused on stealing and apparently they managed to steal approximately 20 million gcs and 2 million runes. They also used spells to destroy more gold and more runes on top of what they had taken with their thieves. According to Jerks they managed to steal 7 million gold and destroy 1 million runes on just one elf in Dopies.
The gold dragon that Dopies had sent to ravage the lands of Jerks lived a short life as it was killed in 30 minutes while Jerks sent a ruby to help lower defences. Dopies targetted Jerks with heavy chains, focusing on the dwarves first but felt it was very ineffective as dwarves are very resilient. Jerks focused on semi chains to drop networth and targetted an elf and a human province. They used NS to help drop targets into double range while focusing MS & greed on the human provinces combined with riots on the elves. They continued in this fashion and looked to semi chain 2-3 provinces per wave with the ultimate focus of chaining a province enough to overpop them and killing enough defence so that it would be easier to continue to hit that province down later on if needed.
Against the heavy chain focus of dopies this proved to be very effective as it gave Jerks a lot of acres plus control of networth! Jerks kept their focus on semi chaining all the big provinces of Dopies while another gold dragon arrived. Dopied had killed the initial ruby they had on them by this stage and Jerks sent a gold dragon of their own. After killing the second dragon from Dopies a third one arrived which Jerks kept on them till the end of the war.
In what turned out to be the last stretch of the war, roughly 12 hours, both kingdoms started to max gain. Dopies threw in the towel and WD from war.
April 21 of YR12 Dopefiends of War has withdrawn from war. Our people rejoice at our victory!
SUMMARIES:
Hostile Summary from Jerks:
Total Attacks Made: 8 (2584 acres)
-- Traditional March: 7 (2489 acres)
-- Ambush: 1 (95 acres)
Total Attacks Suffered: 3 (1340 acres)
-- Traditional March: 2 (1150 acres)
-- Ambush: 1 (190 acres)
The Kingdom of Elitest Jerks:
Total acres exchanged: +1244 acres (8/3)
+658 acres: CSKA Sofia (1/0)
+624 acres: WonderWorld (2/0)
+464 acres: Mudkipz (1/0)
+286 acres: Congratulation Slckrs your Orc (2/1)
+218 acres: fitness freack (1/0)
+144 acres: Bames Jond (1/0)
-535 acres: Dragon (0/1)
-615 acres: Wicked (0/1)
The Kingdom of Dopefiends:
Total acres exchanged: -1244 acres (3/8)
+535 acres: iGot Steroid (1/0)
-9 acres: iGot Mescaline (1/2)
-430 acres: iGot Caffeine (1/3)
-658 acres: iGot Dolophine (0/1)
-682 acres: Errrrr (0/2)
Hostile Summary from Dopefiends:
Total Attacks Made: 3 (1340 acres)
-- Traditional March: 2 (1150 acres)
-- Ambush: 1 (190 acres)
Total Attacks Suffered: 8 (2584 acres)
-- Traditional March: 7 (2489 acres)
-- Ambush: 1 (95 acres)
The Kingdom of Dopefiends:
Total acres exchanged: -1244 acres (3/8)
+535 acres: iGot Steroid (1/0)
-9 acres: iGot Mescaline (1/2)
-430 acres: iGot Caffeine (1/3)
-658 acres: iGot Dolophine (0/1)
-682 acres: Errrrr (0/2)
The Kingdom of Elitest Jerks:
Total acres exchanged: +1244 acres (8/3)
+658 acres: CSKA Sofia (1/0)
+624 acres: WonderWorld (2/0)
+464 acres: Mudkipz (1/0)
+286 acres: Congratulation Slckrs your Orc (2/1)
+218 acres: fitness freack (1/0)
+144 acres: Bames Jond (1/0)
-535 acres: Dragon (0/1)
-615 acres: Wicked (0/1)
War Summary from Jerks:
Total Attacks Made: 259 (78252 acres)
-- Traditional March: 241 (75726 acres)
-- Ambush: 13 (2526 acres)
-- Failed Attacks: 5 (1.9% failure)
Total Attacks Suffered: 285 (57848 acres)
-- Traditional March: 254 (54161 acres)
-- Ambush: 18 (3687 acres)
-- Learns: 1
-- Failed Attacks: 12 (4.2% failure)
The Kingdom of Elitest Jerks:
Total acres exchanged: +20404 acres (259/285)
+4476 acres: jailbaits for breakfast (10/4)
+4122 acres: No Minors Allowed (20/2)
+3006 acres: Mudkipz (11/3)
+2326 acres: MinesofMoria (8/1)
+1997 acres: Dangerthighs (12/4)
+1981 acres: Pendel Is A Poop Sock (5/0)
+1616 acres: Celien Is A Poop Sock (4/0)
+1494 acres: The Monarch (15/17)
+1436 acres: The Mad Hatter (5/0)
+1332 acres: The hairy one (6/3)
+1311 acres: Hate Is A Poop Sock (14/11)
+1183 acres: MinesofMaria (7/2)
+872 acres: CSKA Sofia (10/8)
+681 acres: fitness freack (13/15)
+646 acres: Supreme Ultimate Super Stud (6/6)
+607 acres: I know what u did last age (21/19)
+393 acres: Congratulation Slckrs your Orc (12/7)
+343 acres: Bames Jond (10/6)
-487 acres: Age of Freeze Bugs (18/26)
-537 acres: OMGMYNAMEISCAPSANDLONG (14/17)
-2498 acres: Dragon (15/57)
-2612 acres: Heavens Gate (13/38)
-3284 acres: WonderWorld (10/39)
The Kingdom of Dopefiends:
Total acres exchanged: -20404 acres (285/259)
+1684 acres: Errrrr (13/5)
+1532 acres: iGot Caffeine (13/7)
+665 acres: iGot Marijuana (9/5)
+601 acres: iGot LCD-stamps (8/4)
+370 acres: iGot Peyote (10/2)
+354 acres: iGot Atomoxetine (9/3)
+243 acres: iGot Crack (11/5)
+238 acres: iGot Overdose (10/2)
+117 acres: iGot Heroin (11/4)
-165 acres: iGotShooms (8/2)
-279 acres: iGot Morphine (13/8)
-760 acres: iGot Dolophine (16/11)
-969 acres: iGot Extasy (15/20)
-1105 acres: iGot Cocaine (14/11)
-1273 acres: iGot DMT (7/7)
-1304 acres: iGot Rohypnol (10/7)
-1395 acres: iGot GHB (13/11)
-1461 acres: iGot Gaanja (15/11)
-1796 acres: iGot Mescaline (7/23)
-1927 acres: iGot Skittles (12/12)
-2052 acres: iGot Ketamine (8/10)
-2479 acres: iGot LysergicAcidDiethylamide (9/16)
-2487 acres: iGot Methanphetamines (14/16)
-2737 acres: iGot Steroid (15/19)
-4019 acres: iGot Pregnant (15/38)
War Summary from Dopefiends:
Total Attacks Made: 285 (63149 acres)
-- Traditional March: 254 (59462 acres)
-- Ambush: 18 (3687 acres)
-- Learns: 1
-- Failed Attacks: 12 (4.2% failure)
Total Attacks Suffered: 259 (71470 acres)
-- Traditional March: 241 (68944 acres)
-- Ambush: 13 (2526 acres)
-- Failed Attacks: 5 (1.9% failure)
The Kingdom of Dopefiends:
Total acres exchanged: -8321 acres (285/259)
+2124 acres: Errrrr (13/5)
+1944 acres: iGot Caffeine (13/7)
+1068 acres: iGot LCD-stamps (8/4)
+1061 acres: iGot Marijuana (9/5)
+577 acres: iGot Crack (11/5)
+535 acres: iGot Atomoxetine (9/3)
+522 acres: iGot Peyote (10/2)
+341 acres: iGot Overdose (10/2)
+272 acres: iGot Heroin (11/4)
-1 acres: iGotShooms (8/2)
-29 acres: iGot Morphine (13/8)
-178 acres: iGot Dolophine (16/11)
-289 acres: iGot Extasy (15/20)
-358 acres: iGot Cocaine (14/11)
-705 acres: iGot GHB (13/11)
-716 acres: iGot DMT (7/7)
-836 acres: iGot Gaanja (15/11)
-872 acres: iGot Rohypnol (10/7)
-1234 acres: iGot Skittles (12/12)
-1368 acres: iGot Mescaline (7/23)
-1544 acres: iGot Ketamine (8/10)
-1696 acres: iGot Steroid (15/19)
-1699 acres: iGot LysergicAcidDiethylamide (9/16)
-1951 acres: iGot Methanphetamines (14/16)
-3289 acres: iGot Pregnant (15/38)
The Kingdom of Elitest Jerks:
Total acres exchanged: +8321 acres (259/285)
+4021 acres: jailbaits for breakfast (10/4)
+3525 acres: No Minors Allowed (20/2)
+2576 acres: Mudkipz (11/3)
+2105 acres: MinesofMoria (8/1)
+1803 acres: Pendel Is A Poop Sock (5/0)
+1471 acres: Celien Is A Poop Sock (4/0)
+1441 acres: Dangerthighs (12/4)
+1307 acres: The Mad Hatter (5/0)
+1040 acres: The hairy one (6/3)
+878 acres: MinesofMaria (7/2)
+599 acres: The Monarch (15/17)
+466 acres: Hate Is A Poop Sock (14/11)
+345 acres: CSKA Sofia (10/8)
+135 acres: Supreme Ultimate Super Stud (6/6)
-46 acres: Bames Jond (10/6)
-63 acres: Congratulation Slckrs your Orc (12/7)
-100 acres: I know what u did last age (21/19)
-131 acres: fitness freack (13/15)
-1030 acres: OMGMYNAMEISCAPSANDLONG (14/17)
-1507 acres: Age of Freeze Bugs (18/26)
-3312 acres: Heavens Gate (13/38)
-3345 acres: Dragon (15/57)
-3857 acres: WonderWorld (10/39)
Comments:
Comments from Jerks:
The true story is, we sent Pendel to steal Malm's donkey, which we knew was doing dopefiends war plans, Malm noticed this and decided to war us to take back his drugged donkey, unfortunately the animal was so doped that it helped Jerks to create briliant war plan to nuke Dopies.Some players in Jerks felt in love with the cute animal, with some even proposing marriage to the donkey the grooms were Gawain, Celien and Haso, a nice wedding went on and all got massively wasted which costed some honor to the kingdom. Soon Dopies saw war was lost and they went out, as soon as Jerks saw it they decided to send back the donkey to Malm so he can enjoy it some more time.
Our coment for the war: Pendel-gay leader of Jerks and sex slave of Celien
"JERKS FOREVER' Tks to all of you Jerks for awesome activity and pure pwnage, also i wana thank to Dopefiends and Malm for the clean and fun war, you guys did starve us:-)
Comment from Malm, monarch of Dopefiends:
Slow KDs are slow, Bad KDs are bad!