Except they didn't "need" to (even though it would have been sensible for them to do it), and in the end you only got the CF when you sent it.
Generally I agree with you that I would expect the KD telling me they want a CF to actually offer one (and I would be willing to do the same when it's me wanting the CF), but if they won't do that I am open to finding another way (eg agreeing what time to be online together) to avoid me needing to leave a CF open to the other KD. Ultimately, you both wanted the CF - if you didn't, you wouldn't have accepted/offered it (even though obviously you would have preferred war).