Am I an asshole???

[Excalibus]

An interesting question and I am asking myself if I am because a kingdoms monarch called me that after our kd double quad razed a couple of their provinces (outside of war) when they did not accept the offered cf in a timely manner...

To set the scene, we are a fledgling kingdom - The core has been together 3 ages, and most of us come from a variety of uto experience levels... Anyway we were in the 4.5M to 5M nw bracket, with around 20K acres, 3 wars for the age, we just cf'd with another kingdom when they waved us and yet another kingdom decided to wave us for science... the usual kind of fare, a kingdom that is 6.5 M NW to our 4.6M or so at the start of the wave... I shot them a message early said we are not going to war them, we have our own targets etc...

They say send cf etc, the usual stuff again... I decide to let our tm's have some fun and so do not send a cf straight away... some 10 hours later our steward sends a CF, this is while I am at work and unable to login etc...


Anyway cf was sent on the 13th, I get home on the 15th, see their steward online, ask him to accept the cf etc... no response - I wait an hour while checking their kd page periodically and all the time he is showing here as online... okay I say to myself... As they had sent out attacks after the cf was offered, I decided to turn up the pressure some... I quad raze one of their provinces that had obviously been a chain target in their last war and then I shoot their (still showing as online) steward a warning that in 10 minutes we will do another quad raze... i let it go for 20 minutes... still no response... okay fek this... another quad raze goes out... along with a message stating either accept the cf or accept the consequences (along the lines of an emerald dragon at a time when it would suck for them to get one etc) and gave them a 3 hour window of opportunity to accept the cf before I start the drake...


2 hours go by, then 3, and finally their monarch gets online and accepts the cf then proceeds to tell me i am an asshole for razing their guys...

So am I an asshole??? Their steward claims he was sleeping, he was not online, but then why would he show as online for a 3 hour timeframe... apparently he runs a keep alive thingy in his browser... well how the hell am I to know that, how the hell am i to suppose he is sleeping when he shows as online in the game... Not responding to messages isn't a clue because so many semi ghettos who like to bottom feed just won't answer messages until they have had time to digest the content or feel they can get one more wave in before they accept a cf that's been offered etc...

Quite frankly if i'm gonna be accused of being an asshole then I will become one, right now, we are smacking down on a kingdom 1.5M below our NW, and 2K acres below us ONLY because one of their guys totally suicided anon on us and got caught short... so far they have taken reasonable losses and until they send a CF they will take more losses...

Is it my preferred choice??? Hell no, we have another kingdom that has been a little bit annoying to us that we feel we can probably take in war and they are an equal sized opponent to us but I cannot let the other kingdom go without a cf in place as we did retal the suicider and his kd mates quite vigorously and standing orders are to keep hitting them until a cf is offered... as usual...

[Excalibus]

and for the mods, if someone calls me an asshole in this thread, I honestly won't be offended :D as long as they can quantify and qualify their assertion :D

[Maeldun]

Uh, so a KD 1.5mil nw bigger than you is calling you the asshole? yeah right....

[Korp]

You send mixed signals, if I was the kd that you wanteted to CF i would have waved you again. You claim you want a CF but you dont show it by "letting your tms have some fun" and raze them. Since you're the in the position that you want the CF you should make no demands as in accept a CF in certain time frame or not.

[Excalibus]

my view was to not let them off scott free korp, let our tm's meteor etc their provinces - we were considering actually taking them into war... decided not to... inital message was we were not going to war them... we then decided no we were not going to war them at all, but due to life, i could not get online to send the cf so we ate 10 hours of abducts until our steward sent the cf... such is life... what irks me to be honest is their steward sending me a reply to my initial response saying he would accept the cf as soon as it was sent etc.. then when i log in 2 hours after the cf was sent, he is showing as online and not accepting the cf... after we ate 10 additional hours of abducts etc... soo... no there were no mixed signals... i sent a msg saying we were not interested in war, but that does not mean an auto cf offer IMHO... that means its up to the person waving to decide if they wish to persue it further... had they stopped when i messaged them, the meter would have dropped to unfriendly about 3 hours later...

and you bet i will make demands mate, when a person of influence - in this case their steward, is showing as online and their provinces come on and off etc, and still no acceptance of the cf thats been on the table for over 2 hours... yeah i will demand they accept it or accept the consequences of not accepting it... ima not one to back down man... not from people who think their size matters... just ask bart...

[Korp]

my view was to not let them off scott free korp, let our tm's meteor etc their provinces - we were considering actually taking them into war... decided not to... inital message was we were not going to war them... we then decided no we were not going to war them at all, but due to life, i could not get online to send the cf so we ate 10 hours of abducts until our steward sent the cf... such is life... what irks me to be honest is their steward sending me a reply to my initial response saying he would accept the cf as soon as it was sent etc.. then when i log in 2 hours after the cf was sent, he is showing as online and not accepting the cf... after we ate 10 additional hours of abducts etc... soo... no there were no mixed signals... i sent a msg saying we were not interested in war, but that does not mean an auto cf offer IMHO... that means its up to the person waving to decide if they wish to persue it further... had they stopped when i messaged them, the meter would have dropped to unfriendly about 3 hours later...

If you didnt want to war them dont op them, that will just agitate them. Which shows right? Maybe if you didnt op them nor raze them you might gotten your CF much faster. You seem to think that you're in a position of power in this situation which is wrong.

[Excalibus]

If you didnt want to war them dont op them, that will just agitate them. Which shows right? Maybe if you didnt op them nor raze them you might gotten your CF much faster. You seem to think that you're in a position of power in this situation which is wrong.

I let our TM's op them for S & G's and to let them engage and focus on something while we are in between wars, it's not a bad thing to do... the razes only come after 2.5 hours of waiting for them to accept a cf when their steward is showing as online during that whole time while other provinces in their kingdom flitted in and out of being online...

[Korp]

I let our TM's op them for S & G's and to let them engage and focus on something while we are in between wars, it's not a bad thing to do... the razes only come after 2.5 hours of waiting for them to accept a cf when their steward is showing as online during that whole time while other provinces in their kingdom flitted in and out of being online...

Why do you make a post when you refuse to listen to any other persons opinion?

[CheckerBob]

Maybe he's confused, maybe his own kingdom is calling him the asshole...

Not responding to messages isn't a clue because so many semi ghettos who like to bottom feed just won't answer messages until they have had time to digest the content or feel they can get one more wave in before they accept a cf that's been offered etc...

What's a semi ghetto? Either you are, or you aren't. : D

[Band of Horses]

I agree with Korp here. You are, but I wish you a happy Taylor Swift's birthday nonetheless.

[Thunder TA]

This also why kingdoms come in here complaining people wont end relations.Sometimes diplomacy and common sense go along way towards getting things done.

[Allanon]

As Korp said, if you told me you weren't going to war us and then let your guys op for 10 hours, I would have done another wave or two to ram the point home that if you don't want to war, send the cf promptly and don't mess around. If you then raze my guys, I'd start getting creative.

I won't call you an asshole (not least of reasons for which is I'm the guy on these subforums who's supposed to say "hey, don't call him an asshole"), but rather I'd say you made a move intended to inflame the situation rather than resolve it quickly, and then got nasty when they reacted in a reasonable way by continuing to hit. Fortunately for you, this time the other kd doesn't seem to have been the type to get nasty back.

[Chris121]

I am between Korp and Excalibus on it, although closer to Korp probably. I would generally MS/op and even attack in response to a wave if it won't detract from our own goals, because otherwise there is no incentive for people to stop hitting, but I wouldn't delay sending the CF offer. If you want a CF, then offer it. I would also deal with diplomacy in a diplomatic way... not basically saying "I know we've waited a while before sending the CF, but now that we have done you must accept the CF right now / within an hour" etc because, as Korp said, you are not actually in a position to be making demands.

If I were the other KD in your scenario, I would probably have done a second wave as a result of the way you handled it.

[StratOcastle]

I totally disagree with the notion of not oping or retaliating. Not warring means not going to mechanical war. You offer a CF so they'll move on: it's not a declaration of sissy.

You aren't telling them you won't fight, you're telling them you won't go into a low GBP, higher speed, both sides ops chaosfest.

Let me tell you, we were being waved by some big kingdom, we offered CF, they kept waving and then some guy double abducted me. Oops. Retaliation is just the way it's got to be. My kingdom was not oping and this constitutes absolute rollover, unless I'm in your kingdom.

My point to my kingdom mates isn't that I'm greedy but that they weren't going to stop. Think about that, hard. My game life isn't to be the victim of a grand scheming bottom feeder who thinks they've tricked me into something. I'm retaliating properly.

Wimps and bottom feeders will go on. My actions won't change a culture of fear. The positive side is that my kingdom began to retaliate and the big kingdom honored the CF. I'm not here to tell you about ideal outcomes. I'm here to tell you I encouraged my kingdom to utterly destroy 6 provinces of the aggressing kingdom at all cost...without threats, just action.

Excalibus is like most of us.

[Evilyn]

I would not call you an ahole but your logic is wrong.
I would have waved you until you begged for CF. I assume the bigger KD was getting ready for war or that would have been automatic.
EDIT
@Strato, begged is only a word.

From Excali, I shot them a message early said we are not going to war them, we have our own targets etc.
They say send cf etc, the usual stuff again... I decide to let our tm's have some fun and so do not send a cf straight away. some 10 hours later our steward sends a CF

lol 10 hours. I woulda hit you for 10 more hours. Meaning the Monarch.
Grief runs downhill in this game. Always has, always will.