FUNNY AND CLEVER CLASSIFIED ADS
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER - 8 years old. Hateful little bastard. Bites!
FREE PUPPIES - 1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbour's dog
FREE PUPPIES - Mother is a Kennel Club registered German Shepherd. Father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound.
COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED - Also 1 gay bull for sale
JOINING NUDIST COLONY! - Must sell washer and dryer £100
WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE - Worn once by mistake. Call Stephanie
FOR SALE BY OWNER - Complete set of Encyclopaedia Britannica, 45 volumes. Excellent condition, £200 or best offer. No longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.
1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB - $850/offer
CLOTHES WASHER $100 - Owned by clean bachelor who seldom washed
SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE - Only used on snowy days
FREE PUPPIES - Part German shepherd - part dog
TWO WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES - 1 x 5-finger, 1 x 3-finger, PAIR: $15
TICKLE ME ELMO, STILL IN BOX - Comes with its own 1988 Mustang, 5l, auto, excellent condition $6800
83 TOYOTA HUNCHBACK - $2000
STAR WARS JOB OF THE HUT - $15
GERMAN SHEPHERD - Female. 85lbs. Neutered. Speaks German.
FULL SIZED MATTRESS - 20yr warranty. Like new. Slight urine smell
FREE CAN OF PORK & BEANS - With purchase of 3 br 2 bath home
FOR SALE: LEE MAJORS (6 MILLION DOLLAR MAN) - $50
NORDIC TRACK $300 - Hardly used. Call Chubbie
FREE: FARM KITTENS - Ready to eat
AMERICAN FLAG 60 STARS - Pole included $100
NOTICE: TO THE PERSON OR PERSONS WHO TOOK THE LARGE PUMPKIN ON HIGHWAY 87 NEAR SOUTHRIDGE STORAGE - Please return the pumpkin and be checked. Pumpkin may be radioactive. All other plants in vicinity are dead.
EXERCISE EQUIPMENT - Queen size mattress & box springs -$175
3-YEAR OLD TEACHER NEEDED FOR PRE-SCHOOL - Experience preferred.
FOR SALE - Three canaries of undermined sex.
GREAT DAMES FOR SALE - Free to good home.
WANTED: HAIR CUTTER - Excellent growth potential.
LOST: SMALL APRICOT POODLE - Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family.
FOUR-POSTER BED - 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover.
DOG FOR SALE - Eats anything and is fond of children.
WANTED - Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.
WANTED - Widower with school-age children requires person to assume general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to growth of family.
FOR SALE - Several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.
PS - thx 4 the war 2:3